Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
