i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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