i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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