she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Randomize
