Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
