also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
