Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
the day after is always just damage control
you will always have a special place in my vag
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Randomize
