O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
