I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Randomize
