fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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