I feel great
I just peed on a car
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Do you have feelings for this penis?
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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