Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
