so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
