I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
Randomize
