I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
My friends, they love my intelligence
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Randomize
