So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
