ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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