i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
