You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize