All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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