I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Randomize
