I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
Randomize
