After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
this boner is exhausting
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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