at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Randomize
