My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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