We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
I just sucked dick on a ferry
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Randomize
