Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
if only i could text you this smell
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
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