It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Randomize