Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Randomize
