no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Randomize
