I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
My balls are so social today.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
