addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
