so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
