So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
Who wears a wallet chain?!
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
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