Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize