Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
