Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
