the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Randomize
