Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Randomize
