i just found a plastic monkey in my sweatshirt pocket
Umm I had a plastic mermaid in my pants......
Really
You win
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
