There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Drunk is a universal language darling
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