Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize