Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
