Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
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