is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Randomize
