I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Randomize