Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
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