i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize
