I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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