is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
i think i just lost a toe
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
